Soldier of Fortune

*Disclaimer: I do not own the Invader Zim characters and am not making any money off of this story. The characters and concept of the Invader Zim show, as well as JTHM, to which there are a few references, belong to the almighty Jhonen Vasquez (and I think partially to Nickelodeon). ALL HAIL THE MIGHTY JHONEN!! This disclaimer applies FOR ALL FUTURE CHAPTERS OF THIS FANFIC.


*********Well, first off, my beloved readers, don't ask where the heck all this inspiration is coming from...I'm just going with it. It should be interesting to have two stories going at once, I think. Well, off to the fic, and enjoy, my pig-smelly loves! *lurve to all*

SOLDIER OF FORTUNE


PROLOGUE:

In the dead of night, an Irken ship landed in the middle of a deserted Earth neighbourhood and its occupant stepped out, utilizing the tools at her disposal to set up a base that fit in with the decrepit surroundings. Appearance was not crucial, there would be plenty of time for that later once her mission from the Tallests was completed.

It had been ten years since she had last been on this planet, and at that time her mission was personal. Now that the mission was endorsed by the Tallests, she had even more motivation to succeed. She had been given new equipment, a new Voot Runner, a new SIR unit, and a promise of rewards that would satisfy all the dreams she had ever had.

Tak grinned.

Zim was going to pay this time.


Chapter 1: Bad Press

Already in holographic disguise, the seemingly human Tak walked down the street towards the location of Zim’s disgustingly obvious base. However, as she approached the location, she frowned. The formerly neon green house had been painted over in white, but that was not what disturbed her. The enormous coils extending from the Irken base into the other two houses were being dismantled by a human wrecking crew, and enormous motorized machines were tearing up the earth in front of the structure.

Something was very, very wrong…

She continued on past the crumbling remnants of Zim’s base, looking around warily. As she passed by a newspaper stand on the side of the street, she stopped in her tracks, her eyes widening.

There, on the front page, was her nemesis.

Tak snatched one of the newspapers, her eyes flashing as she wiped the vendor’s memory of her existence and then ran off. Sitting down on a bench in the shade, she scanned the article.


YOUNG MEMBRANE MAKES EARTH-SHATTERING DISCOVERY!

After years of fighting to prove the existence of aliens, Dib Membrane has just made a discovery that has provided irrefutable evidence to support his claim. Earlier this week the son of the great Professor Membrane brought a specimen into a nearby research lab, a specimen unlike anything the world has ever seen before.

“It seems that he was right all along, and I’m very proud of him for making such an amazing scientific discovery.” Professor Membrane was quoted as saying at a press conference yesterday.

According to Dib, the alien has been living on Earth for just over ten years without being discovered, but now that he has been captured, the alien will be studied and subjected to testing. Plans to broadcast the autopsy worldwide are in the making, as well as a series of episodes on Mysterious Mysteries of Strange Mystery which will highlight Dib Membrane’s documentation and the discoveries that are made in the next few weeks.

Sporktronics Labs has taken on sponsorship for the experimentation, and Dib Membrane will be teaming up with a group of their scientists to study and examine this life form from outer space. While no indication was given as to what kinds of testing would be performed, the information discovered will be available online at several of the major news websites as it is published.

Associated Press

Tak scowled. This was very, very bad indeed. Not only did the humans stand to gain a dangerous amount of knowledge about the Irken race, but they were also going to sabotage her mission if they destroyed Zim before she got a hold of him.

Something would have to be done, and soon.