Goddess Rising

The area where the sky touched the ground seemed to roll and change color beneath the burning sun. Gaz looked down at her legs, stretched silkily over coarse brown belvet pillows. Though the back of her mind was screaming, she felt her face stretch into a smile as a strange three-fingered claw traveled gently upward on her thigh.

How could Dib stand it? Is this what Zim's caresses feel like?

Looking up again, she saw more of the creatures approaching her from the edge of the horizon. Some walked on all six legs, some were bipedal. Thousands of translucent wings glinted in the strange light, nearly blinding her.

What was a humanoid doing among all the bugs?

The same claw traveled beneath the sheath of her dress, and she felt bile rising up in her throat.

**********

Dib could have easily spent the following days avoiding Valerie with fervor--had she been available. Fortunately (or unfortunately?) for him, she spent most of her time working on the ship with Zim, and retiring early on most nights. Dib was quite thankful for this, as he had absolutely no interest in continuing an intimate relationship with Val... Much less a plural one.

Though sometimes, late at night, he thought of what it might be like to watch her and Zim together... His brows knitted in concentration as he pounded into her... Listening to her moans as her little breasts bounced with every thrust...

Then the rational, more jealousy-prone side of his mind would interrupt and tell him that was a ridiculous thing to even consider thinking about.

Dib was feeling better than he had felt in a long time. Sighing happily, he lay back and began writing the third chapter of his memoirs. Lately he had decided to combat his homesickness by recalling everything he possibly could about his life on Earth and recording it... He hoped that someday a benevolent alien race would take interest in remembering his humble planet. Maybe someone would make a movie about it or something.

The cool air caressed his naked skin as he removed his shirt and got comfortable. As he proceeded to type, Zim approached from behind and began to touch his sides tentatively. This went on for a few moments while Dib continued typing, trying not to be distracted. It wasn't until Zim sat on his knees beside the chair, with his head practically in Dib's lap, that the boy finally spoke up.

Shivering slightly as Zim's antennae brushed over his stomach, Dib moaned, "What are you doing?"

"Diagnostics," Zim replied absentmindedly, closing his eyes.

Dib almost thought to ask what Zim was talking about, but he couldn't resist having the alien in such a prone position. Deciding to test out the things he had recently learned about the alien anatomy, he started at the tip of a frail antenna and traced a delicate line to the base, rubbing Zim's skull just behind the small dimple there.

Zim immediately went limp, sighing and closing his eyes.

When Valerie opened the door to the computer room, she was greeted by the sight of Dib's back arched almost painfully against the soft plastic chair, stroking Zim's antennae as if they were his dick. With every upstroke of his antennae Zim purred desperately, drawing Dib's cock ever deeper into his mouth.

Valerie instantly felt blood rushing to her loins and she leaned into the doorway to get a better view. They were so absorbed in their own activities that they hadn't even heard her come in.

Despite her assurance of this, she didn't jump any less when she heard a footfall close behind her. She closed the door swiftly, quietly, and turned to see Gaz drowsily approaching from the end of the hall. Dib's sister was almost always on top of things, but she looked positively baffled when she arrived to find Valerie grasping the door handle with her back toward the computer room.

"I wouldn't suggest going in there right now," Val whispered, face flushing more with each second.

Judging by the look on Gaz's face, she hadn't caught Valerie peeping. "Auugh," she moaned, "Can't they keep that in their own half of the ship?!"

"Honestly," Valerie groaned, feigning disgust as best she could.

Turning on her heel and heading for the kitchen, Gaz sighed, "I just don't get what he likes so much about getting it on with an Irken." As Valerie trotted to catch up, she went on, "Those little wiggly feelers, the cold claws..." She shuddered.

"Well... You know... Everyone has their kink." Trying to salvage her ego, which was taking a blunt beating from Gaz's disgust, she continued, "Did you know that the humans and Irkens are actually, on a distant level, biologically compatible?"

Quirking an eyebrow, Gaz asked, "Oh really? How so?"

"Well... I'm not sure yet, though I've read old mythological tales about a 'Goddess' that appeared to be humanoid." Gaz's interested was piqued, so she went on, "I DO know that Irkens, when in the throes of lust, release a type of pheromone that activates pleasure centers in the human brain. And-- certain human fluids, I hear, are very arousing to Irkens."

At this last statement, Gaz's mouth twisted into a conniving smile. "Is that so? How do you know this, eh? Zim let you in on some trade secrets?" She stopped in her tracks and leaned into Val's face, uncomfortably close. "Zim been taking some golden showers lately?"

Valerie didn't know whether to laugh or cry at this, so she instead tried to inch her way out of Gaz's face. Gaz, however, just barked in laughter and turned back to head for the kitchen.

"Why do you act like that?!" Valerie whined, following yet again.

Gaz didn't bother to answer, just clasped her hands behind her back and kept her pace.

"Don't you ever-- get lonely?" Valerie ventured, angered at not receiving a satisfying answer from Gaz.

Glancing back at her companion, Gaz replied, "Lonely...?"

"Dib told me that, even on Earth, you were on who usually kept to herself. You never got lonely then?"

"Never," Gaz answered matter-of-factly. The pair entered the kitchen and Valerie sat at the table as Gaz tinkered with the food processor.

"Why not?"

The machine began to hum and Gaz turned her attention to Val, a courtesy she rarely afforded Dib. "Because," she sighed, trying to preserve her patience, "People are stupid, feckless, boring... Not worth my time... They annoy me."

"But certainly you don't think EVERYONE is like that," Val probed, emphasis hidden in her words.

"If they're not, they're irritatingly bubbly and too eager to please," Gaz barked back pointedly.

Val laughed. "Dually noted."

A vague imitation of a pizza appeared from the food processor, and Gaz sat down adjacent to Val at the table. Showing no sign that she cared to continue the conversation, she began to eat.

"I guess... I'm just scared of rejection," Val observed, putting out her hands on the table. "I mean, ever since I was a child I've been labeled 'unwanted'... I just want people to like and accept me."

Gaz swallowed and looked up. "Ever tried just being YOURSELF?"

"Am I not myself?" Val replied, incredulous.

"Oh, come on," Gaz moaned, rolling her eyes. "You hang on every word Dib says, and you follow the Irken around like a fucking pet dog." She gestured toward the study where the culprits were currently 'indisposed.' "You can't honestly tell me that you look up to those two. I could have sworn you were smarter than that."

Slighly affronted, Val replied, "My affection for them is genuine. Zim is fascinating, he's so unlike any other Irken in the universe I've read about. He might very well be a defect in their breeding program."

"I could have told you that!" Gaz snorted, looking back down at her food.

Smiling knowingly, Val continued, "I think his body is rebelling against the Pak-- He's trying to separate from it and think with the natural brain God gave him."

"And that process has made him gay for Dib, hmm?" Gaz scoffed.

"Honestly, Gaz, Dib is one of the sweetest, smartest, most honest and sincere people I've ever met," Val answered pleadingly. "Without the mission to cloud his judgement, I'm not surprised at all that Zim accepted his advances. I really don't understand why you seem to hate him so much."

When Gaz didn't even deign to reply or act as if she were listening, Valerie plowed on, if a tad sheepishly, "Though... I may be biased." She shrugged. "Ever since I was in elementary school, I've looked up to the Membrane family with so much love and admiration..."

"So, if I were as pathetic and lonely as Dib, would you open your legs for me too?" Gaz looked at her with an expression as cold as ice.

Valerie's jaw dropped open in shock. Surely she didn't know-- about THAT-- did she? All she could do was stare blankly as Gaz shoved the last bite of pizza into her mouth.

Suddenly, Dib appeared in the kitchen doorway just out of Val's peripheral vision. She nearly jumped out of her skin when he cried, "There you are, Valerie..."

"Finally done with the computers, are we?" Gaz growled. Dib flushed a deep red as his sister stalked out of the room.

When she was out of earshot, Dib looked to Val and said quietly, "I need to talk to you."

"S-sure Dib... What is it?"

Seeing that she was somewhat shaken and not eager to move from her seat, Dib walked up to her and knelt next to the chair. "I heard the door open," he said quietly, trying to keep his face calm. "I know you were watching us."

She covered her mouth and her heart began to pound. "Dib..."

"Don't try to deny it, Valerie," he interrupted, face stern. "Zim heard you as well. And... Well... I had a talk with him and..." Looking at the floor and rubbing the back of his neck, he stumbled on, "I don't want you to take this the wrong way, Val. You're a very beautiful, sweet, smart--"

"--I get it, Dib. You don't want me to be a part of-- You're not interested in--"

Holding up a defensive hand, Dib cried, "Not that--I'm not interested! I mean, you felt great-- I mean, I'm sure someone else would enjoy- I mean..." He sighed in exasperation and looked at the floor again. "What I'm trying to say is, there's only space in my heart for one. And that space is already taken..."

She felt as if she had been punched in the chest. "So gallantly worded," she whispered, rising shakily to her feet and going to leave the room.

"Valerie!" Dib cried, readying to follow her.

Turning to Dib and holding out her hand to stop him, she choked, "I'm fine. Really. I understand completely." Dib stopped in his tracks, confounded, and she left, satisfied that he wouldn't follow her.

As she walked toward her quarters, the talk she had with Gaz about rejection seemed to mock her from the back of her mind. Of course, what did she expect? For the boys to welcome her into their lives with open arms... Lives that had already started without her long before? Why did she think either one of them would be willing to share their affection with her? She felt shame overcome her at the thought of how Dib would feel if he knew Zim took her for a "test run" before he agreed to let her sleep with Dib. Bitter tears flowed down her cheeks as she made her way down the hall, clouding her vision so much she almost didn't see Gaz, who was waiting for her just outside of the study.

"I was afraid you'd take it the wrong way," Gaz moaned, leaning back on the wall with a foot propped up.

Valerie was shaken from her revelry. "Hm? Uh?"

Offering an apologetic hand, Gaz replied, "Making that crack about you and Dib. It was a low blow and I apologize." As her hand went unshaken and Val just looked blankly at her, Gaz's conciliatory expression changed to one of annoyance. "Look, I know you've always had a crush on him, I can just tell by looking at you when you're with him." She pulled her hand back and folded her arms. "And he all but ignores you; he doesn't even care about your feelings. He's a fucking moron." Valerie, realizing Gaz was clueless about her encounter with Dib, smiled halfheartedly. Encouraged, Gaz continued, "He's always been like that, he latches on to one thing and obsesses about it until it slips away from him. He's really selfish, and even my dad had a hard time keeping him under control."

Valerie looked away, back down the hallway in Dib's general direction. Gaz almost sounded like she resented him. Was it just envy of the oldest child, or something much deeper in their family history? Val couldn't comprehend it, as she never had any real siblings OR a real family.

"Dib's not worth your tears, Valerie," Gaz said quite seriously. She grabbed Valerie's chin semi-roughly and forced her to make eye-contact. "Someday I'm sure you'll meet somebody who is meant for you."

There was some kind of meaning in Gaz's expression, and Valerie couldn't decipher what it was. Was it pity? Valerie, pitied by the emotionally detached Gaz? It had to be some sort of cruel joke. A new flood of tears began to make their way down her cheeks. "And who, exactly, shall I find?" she croaked, pulling away from Gaz's touch. "INufax from the planet Teflon?! The human race is extinct, my dear." She threw up her hands. "We're it!"

Gaz looked at her for a moment, searchingly. Val, feeling foolish, tried to calm herself. After a few moments of awkward silence, Gaz finally spoke.

"You know, you were right about getting lonely..."

"Oh?" Val was taken aback at this admission.

Shrugging, Gaz continued, "I really missed my dad. I needed at least SOMEONE that I could have intelligent conversation with. So-- I hacked into the Planetary Federation newsnets..." She reached out and grabbed Valerie's forearm with a childish fervor. "...And I stumbled across something great! Would you like to see it?"

Astonished at Gaz's uncharacteristic eagerness, Val nodded, slack-jawed.

With a genuine smile on her face,Gaz led Valerie into the computer room.

****************

Dib found Zim in his quarters exactly where he had been left, studying his computer screen with intensity. Flopping down on his back atop their bed, Dib sighed, "I think I really hurt her feelings, Zim."

"Oh?" the Irken mumbled, stroking his chin.

"I was trying to be gentle with her. I guess I really couldn't have avoided it..."

"You're right," Zim replied, voice detached.

Shooting his partner an evil eye, Dib added, "And Tak just stopped by. We had wild sex."

"Hm," Zim piped up, unwavering.

"ZIM!"

The alien finally jerked toward Dib's direction, eyes wide. "What? What?!"

"You're not listening to a word I say."

Flailing his arm at Dib, Zim cried, "Again, you and your obsession with words! Always with words, you are." He turned back to the computer. "Words..." His attention had again been stolen from Dib.

His curiousity piqued, Dib snuck up behind Zim and looked over his shoulder at the screen. Though he had a rudimentary knowledge of Irken from his studies, he was still fairly in the dark.

"'Tracking...' Tracking what?"

"Tracking... Our trackers," Zim answered irritably, poking the screen roughly and moving some characters around. "I have two different signals, from two sources, locking on to us." He growled. "I can't get a read on either one, or terminate the connection." Some more poking and typing. "They're piggybacking eachother. When I'm about to sever one, the other breaks through and reestablishes a link."

"Why are they tracking us?" Dib's stomach sank.

"I think they both have intention of docking," Zim answered, turning meaningfully toward Dib. "Which can only mean, to me, that they're Irken ships."

Dib's grip on the chair tightened. "Do you think they--have bad intentions?"

Turning back to the screen and continuing to poke, Zim answered, "If we're lucky we won't have to find out."

**********************

Valerie gawked at the computer screen. "I can't believe it! The resemblance IS uncanny."

"It's just an artist's rendering, though... It could be a coincidence..."

"But you said you've been having dreams, right?"

Gaz frowned. "Constantly."

"How did they start?"

Looking at the floor, Gaz shuddered at the recollection. "When we were trapped on the Irken mothership--"

"--The Massive--"

"--Whatever. I found some of GIR's parts and tried to reconstruct him, hoping maybe he knew a way to escape from the cell I was in." Gaz made an all over gesture. "There were no doors or windows, no nothing." She looked at her hands, fiddling with some imaginary parts. "But once I got him put together, he lacked power. A spark of life, as it were... So I managed to pull some circuitry out of the floor and jolt his little brain with it. "She looked pointedly at Val. "But I shocked myself in the process and blacked out... Next thing I knew GIR is looking down at me holding out his little hand, and I hear a voice saying some gibberish, maybe it was Irken..."

Valerie leaned back in her chair. "You know, I've wondered if the Irkens are indeed like insects in that they have a hive mentality, and everything they utilize seems to be imbued with one mind. One soul."

"So you're saying I absorbed the ship's personality or something?"

Valerie nodded, scratching her ear. "But this image of the Goddess, it's such a striking likeness..."

"What do you know about the Goddess?" Gaz asked her urgently, wishing to move on, away from the creepy picture.

"Quite a bit," Val replied. "She appears a lot in early recounts of Irken history... Apparently she was responsible for the continuance of the Irken race."

"What a heroine," Gaz sighed, rolling her eyes. "Let me guess, she let all of the Irkens fuck her and she squirted out hundreds of little bug babies."

Blushing, Val answered, "You could put it that way... How do you know? Dreams?"

"Dib WISHES he had as many Irken-filled sex dreams as I have."

Her heart filled with pity, despite having a certain attraction to Irkens herself, Valerie tried to plow on. "And that's probably why Irkens have so many humanoid characteristics. They could probably return to their older incarnations with current breeding methods, but I imagine they're not willing to risk extinction again. It seems that the death of their queen lead to their almost dying out... Only recently did females become more common in their species."

"Which explains why the Irkens in my dreams had all those legs and the wings and the UGH." Gaz prickled, trying to put the ugly images of Irken mating from her mind.

Valerie couldn't quit studying the image of the Goddess. "I just can't fathom that, so many millennia ago, humanoids existed in the capacity you claim you dream about." Gaz simply shrugged in reply, so Val went on, "She couldn't possibly be from Earth. If she was... Then she could be one of your ancestors! But... That's impossible... But... It'd explain the similarities in looks you have to her..." She grabbed Gaz's sleeve. "But why exactly did she go from 'Goddess' to 'Destroyer'? The records don't show any real reason as to why she went berserk one day and started killing Irkens..."

Avoiding eye contact with Valerie, Gaz pondered. "Maybe... She saw into the future... Saw what a horrible race of demons they would become. What would happen to the race she had saved."

Gaz's answer was so oddly presented that Val didn't know if she should consider it a joke or not. She just uttered, "But it's because of her that Irkens embraced technology like they did! A gift from the Vortians was all that kept her from destroying the Irken race she had helped revive." She pointed at her palm demonstratively. "And their attachment to technology led them to conquer other races for the acquisition of it."

"Well then I guess she was just stupid?"

Shaking her head sadly, Valerie finished, "I guess that's what happens when you tempt fate by trying to stop death itself.."

It was then that Dib burst into the room. "Valerie!" he cried, "Can you fight at all?"

Valerie blanched. "Fight?! What-- Why?!"

Suddenly, there was a horrible explosive noise and they were all thrown to the floor as the ship lurched sideways. "They were closer than we thought..." he cried, grabbing onto a chair and climbing to his feet.

"Oh my god!" Valerie cried, grabbing Gaz around the shoulders and cowering behind her.

The sound of GIR's maniacal laughter echoed throughout the ship. "The hull! The hull has been breached!"

"Gaz, take care of Valerie!" With that said, Dib spirited away down the hall, throwing off his trenchcoat. As he ran the alarm's screeching assaulted his senses and he bellowed, "Where are they, GIR?!"

"Section OT-Zweeeiiiiiiiiii...." His voice faded out as the intercom and the alarm bells were cut. Luckily, the OT corrdor was just a moment's run away, and he turned into it to see Zim taking on about twenty Irken soldiers who had filtered out of a mid-sized passenger craft. The hall was a mess of laser fire and spider legs, but Dib charged into the fray with fists flying.

After he connected with a couple of heads, the others began to take notice and trained their guns on him. Zim turned with them, crying out when he saw the culprit behind his distraction. "Dib!" he bellowed. "I told you to take cover!"

"I couldn't leave you to fight these guys alone!"

A tentacle was suddenly heading for his head, straight from Zim's Pak. He fell sharply to the side, dumbfounded, and felt a shard of metal hit the side of his cheek. He looked up to see a soldier screaming at the remnants of his claw, which had been shattered when Zim knocked the laser from it.

"This is not your fight," Zim growled, turning to take on two more of the intruders. A third jumped at Zim and tried to rip the Pak from his back. Howling, Dib jumped to his feet and swung the very shard of metal that had just sliced into his cheek, burrowing into the Irken soldier's neck. He instantly let go of Zim and gurgled in a sickly fashion when the human grabbed his shoulder and ripped the shard completely across the back of his neck, severing his spinal cord and killing him instantly.

The remaining soldiers all stopped in their tracks, looking incredulously at the body of their fallen comrade.

"I can cover your ass too," Dib hissed, sidling up next to Zim so that they were in the center of the advancing group.

Zim sighed heavily. "You don't understand the Irken rules of war, Dib... Instant death is not honorable death. Only Pak death... Instant death is inexcusable..."

When he saw the soldiers' faces contorted in anger, he thought that maybe he DID understand. Totally ignoring their original quarry, the 12 or so remaining soldiers attacked Dib with their claws and tentacles mercilessly tearing at his clothing and skin. "DIB!" Zim cried brokenly, trying in futility to break through the wall of bodies and rescue his lover. Dib, feeling stupider than ever, curled up into a ball and tried to defend himself against the flurry of attacks. He thanked God that they weren't using their lasers... Probably another Irken rule of engagement. Suddenly, however, the weight was lifted.

Through a cloud of blood and tears, he saw the crowd part to turn and look at Zim. He was standing stalk-still, muscles tensed, jaw tightening spasmodically. His spider legs were frozen in mid-air. Behind him stood another Irken, nearly as tall as he was, who was obviously the leader of the squadron by his mode of dress. The other Irkens' jaws dropped as they laid eyes on the long mechanical instrument the Captain was holding... Something like a gun that had a thin wire coming from the tip of the barrell... Leading directly into an opening in Zim's Pak, laid bare by an extended spider leg.

"Captain Zud! Is that a--??"

Nodding curtly, he replied, "It is. Have you all forgotten our original mission!? Don't let these simpletons distract you with sentiment."

Zim licked his lips cautiously. "Disruptors were outlawed 438 years ago after that 'incident' with Tallest Harken. If you use that on me the Control Brains will eat you alive."

"Oh no!" Zud chuckled. "Almighty Tallest Purple authorized me to use this beautiful instrument...." Leaning forward so that his cheek was pressed against Zim's, he hissed, "Just for yoooou."

Dib jumped to his feet just as the instrument flashed. He ran to Zim in time to see the blood seemingly drain from his eyes. His face went blank, body limp. Zud's laughter echoed throughout the hallway as Zim fell into Dib's arms. Choking, Dib dropped on his hindquarters, turning Zim upward and shaking him roughly. His face was cold and empty, eyes fixed.

"What did you do to him?!" Dib bellowed, tears rushing to his eyes.

Knocking Dib harshly across the temple with the Disruptor, Zud barked, "He's dead, you fool. His Pak is no longer Synapsed."

Burrowing his head in Zim's chest, Dib began to sob. He pulled Zim's body close to him, trying with all his might to elicit some sort of reaction and prove his love was indeed still alive.

"What is he doing...?"

"It doesn't matter," Zud hissed. "Now let's go, we have to reclaim this ship for Almighty Tallest Red or WE'LL end up like those pathetic bastards there..."

Footsteps retreated from Dib's prone form; he could tell just by listening that they were heading for the control room. They were going to retake the ship... And do what? Take the humans hostage again? Keep them as pets?

No, he killed one of their own. They'd kill him, sooner or later.

Swallowing more tears, Dib rubbed his head against Zim's chest one last time. What was the point of living if he didn't even have Zim?

....Strangely, he heard a whirring noise coming from deep within... Did Zim have some sort of self destruct mechanism implanted in there?

Dib smiled bitterly. The question was not "Did Zim have it?" but "When would it go off?"

There were still two other people on the ship, and GIR was running around somewhere... Dib had to help them. The Spittle Runner Val had stolen was probably fully operational after all of the tinkering Zim had done to it... They could escape and try to find help somewhere... Or die alone in space from starvation or oxygen deprivation... Well, either way, he figured it'd be better than dying at the hands of Purple or Zim's self destruct device.

Wiping away his tears, Dib laid Zim's body gently upon the floor and kissed him on the forehead.

He took off running toward the computer room, hoping he would find the girls quickly. As he ran, the bones in his ankle made horrific squelching sounds.

Zim is dead Zim is dead Zim is dead Zim is dead Just like that he's gone.

The pain in his chest was unbearable. The emptiness threatened to consume him with every step.

End Chapter 9