Of Cats and Men

“Please……” Schwenk panted in pain. “I really don’t know who killed that scientist…..besides…I have an alibi……”

“The lioness?” the tiger snorted. “She’s lying……”

“She’s not…….besides…..what would the magistrates say? If she give me an alibi…..you would need to have evide…….” Schwenk stopped and smiled.

“You haven’t have you……you want a confession because you don’t know who did it…..oh…oh….very clever…..”

The tiger growled in his throat. Then he spoke.

“You think you’re so clever don’t you?”

“I am clever…..clever enough to avoid prison…….”

“Clever enough to avoid death?” the tiger looked deep into Schwenk’s eyes.

“What…what do you mean…death?”

The tiger raised his eyebrows.

“Oh? The great Schwenk hasn’t heard about his friend?”

“What the bollocks you talking about……”

The tiger put the human down on the ground…roughly and then banged on the door. He then grabbed the human’s wrist and dragged him through to another room. Inside it was cold and covered in white tiles.

“What is this place??”

The tiger nodded to a leopard who was in attendance. The leopard carried out a large steel box that was painted in black. He opened the top. The tiger thrust Schwenk to it and Schwenk peered in and threw up in a conveniently placed bucket.

“Wha…wha…..what is that…..” he coughed.

“Don’t you recognise it? Schwenk you disappoint me…..that’s your good friend….Digger!” he laughed. Schwenk threw up again. The tiger continued.

“I’m guessing that whoever did that to Digger would love to meet up with you….Of course…..you know who did it…don’t you?”

“No…..no I don’t…..” he lied.

“Now Schwenk…why would you want to protect them? You’re next…they’d be better of in a cell, right?”

“Then do your bloody job….don’t expect me to help you….” Schwenk snapped.

The tiger roared and grabbed Schwenk by the scruff of the neck. He dragged him back to the cell, but before he got there Stride stopped them.

“Anything?”

The tiger pulled a disgusted face.

“Nothing…..but I have re-acquainted him with Digger….” he growled.

“Oh? I hope that went well…….”

“He says he didn’t know who did that either……” the tiger increased his grip on the human.

“Sorry Stride……not much help to you really!” he replied innocently.

“Tyran….let him go….” Stride said.

The tigers jaw dropped open.

“What? Sir, I can get a confession out of him….he’s fairly soft and squidgy….it won’t take long!”

“No Tyran……he has greater problems than us I suspect…so…we release him….and see who eats him….an easy arrest….eh, Schwenk?”

“Very funny…….it must be hard to join the police…..you’ve got to be either stupid or covered in fleas…..I’m guessing Tyran is due for promotion if that’s the case.”

The tiger growled and slammed Schwenk into the wall, then let him go.

“..and the worst part of it is…..I didn’t get my fucking razor!!” Schwenk noted and left the station.

He ran all the way home, as fast as his legs could carry him.