.Smurfette and the Potion

"Wrap the cloth around your heads," Papa Smurf told his band of rescuers. "It'll protect you from the love-potion cloud." Suiting words to actions, he covered his face with the white cloth, coming to resemble a short, turquoise bandit.

"Oh, that's smurfy!" one complimented him.

The other Smurfs wrapped their own cloths around their head, producing everything from a turban to an origami moustache. While many were striking, none covered both their nose and mouth, so were useless against the mist. Papa looked them over for a second.

"New plan!" he announced. Taking Brainy Smurf's cloth-Fez into his own hands, he fashioned the strip of cloth into a blindfold across Brainy's eyes. "Now do that." The others quickly followed suit.

Groping around the grass, Tough Smurf asked: "Will this protect us from the love potion, Papa Smurf?"

"Nope," he admitted, turning to walk towards Gargamel's home. "But if you do get horny, I'd rather you couldn't find me." The voices faded behind him as he approached the hut alone.

Outside of the front door, the alchemist's cat was curled up with a hen. Both slept with satisfied smiles. Papa Smurf shook his head as he slipped past.

Inside, he saw the last wisps of lavender smoke curl up over the edge of the pot. He avoided the tendrils of gas as he gazed around the room.

"Smurfette?" he called softly. With no response, he moved towards the nearest doorway.

Before he got there, he heard sounds from the other side. "That's Smurfette!" he said excitedly. "Is she... Giggling?"

Easing his head around the frame, he stopped in stunned silence.

Across the room, Gargamel lay on his back on the rickety cot. His robes were hoisted up to his armpit, and a very firm erection was in view at his crotch.

Papa barely noticed that detail, though. Smurfette hung from her grip on the man's thumb, lowering her over Gargamel's mouth. Her legs were spread across his cheeks like his lips were a saddle. The man kissed and licked at the join of her legs.

"Oooooh!" she said gleefully. "That makes me feel all smurfy in my secret private girl place."

"Crabapples," Papa Smurf muttered. "She's much too young to be using such language." He looked around the room for any idea about how to rescue his little ward from the evil wizard. Before he could come up with an idea, she spoke again.

"Oh! Look! Somebody's ready for another round of 'Ride The -"

"STOP!" Papa Smurf shouted, running across the floor. The two on the bed smiled down at him.

"Papa Smurf!" Smurfette giggled. "You look like a highwayman."

"A tiny, blue robber," Gargamel agreed. "I guess you're avoiding the love-potion smoke?" Papa stared back up at the man.

"You know?"

"I'm in love," the man replied. "Not stupid."

"Well," Smurfette said, "not any more stupid, Snookums."

"Ah. I see your point, my dear." He set her down on the floor and stroked her hair once with a gnarled finger. "Well, you should get going before this wears off."

"Oh, but I could never leave you!" she cried.

"And if you wait another ten minutes, I'll never let you leave," he answered with a sad smile. "But as long as I love you, I can't hurt you. So, go along with Papa Smurf before it's too late."

"Oh, you'd never be so-" She was interrupted when Papa Smurf bodily lifted the naked girl to his shoulder and took off running for the door.

"Okay, bye, thanks for everything, maybe we'll call you some time, keep in touch," he shouted as he ran. Smurfette kicked her feet and waved g'bye. Gargamel waved back, then sank back down to the pillow.

His smile slowly faded, as his erection slowly softened. The alchemist started to fidget, finally reaching under his shoulder to pull out one tiny white shoe. He stared at it, sitting on his fingertip.

"I really, really hate those Smurfs," he muttered.

The end...