The Lima Bean Revue

"Fine, but you have to promise not to tell anyone."

"I give you my word," Chase replied, secretly crossing his fingers.

"Yeah, whatever good that is. Anyway, it's Mr. Tohomiko."

"Kimiko's father? Oh, this is rich," Chase replied, smiling broadly.

"Anyway, I want to know what he's doing on all of these 'business' trips he's always on. I'm going to use the Changing Chopsticks to sneak into his briefcase, so I can see what's going on." Wuya paused, her expression changed. "Do you think I'm being overly possessive?"

"Wuya, you're a Heylin witch. Of course you expect complete and utter obedience from him."

"I guess you're right. At first I was just in it for the sex, and for the expression on Kimiko's face when she found out, but now I think I'm starting to develop feelings for the man. I know it's despicable."

"Actually, I can relate to that. You know ... me and Jack. Well, it's been difficult."

"Don't compare my tawdry affair to your lecherous crush. Actually, they're both deliciously evil so go ahead. Anyway, I must be off. We have reservations at Jean Georges, and we can't be late. Ta!"

"Farewell," Chase snivelled.

X

Meanwhile Jack was hurriedly putting all of his worldly possessions back in his suitcase. He was so angry. How could Chase have treated him like that? Jack had always been jealous of Wuya, because she always seemed to win. Kind of. He tried to get the zipper shut, but it kept getting stuck on the feathers of the boa, which he had stupidly placed on top.

"What are you doing?" asked an icy voice behind Jack.

"I'm leaving you," Jack responded, not looking up.

"But you just came back. Come on, calm down, my pretty little Jack."

"No! You can't treat me like that! Now I'm here on my terms, not yours, and if I want to leave, then I can do it."

"Not if I tell my jungle cats to stop you."

"You wouldn't. Ugh! I hate you!" Jack threw a balled up pair of socks at Chase.

"What will make it all better?" Chase asked, tiring quickly of all the dramatics.

"Tell me who Wuya's boyfriend is, and I guess I'll forgive you."

"I can't tell you that," Chase paused. "I gave her my word, remember?"

"Yes, but I also remember that you're evil and you have no morals, so dish."

"Fine. She's dating Kimiko's father."

Jack turned pale. "You're kidding, right?"

"No, why?"

"Um, I don't think she needs the Changing Chopsticks to find out if he's cheating on her. I know he is."

"How do you know that?" Chase snapped back.

"Because, well, I don't know how to say this, but ... I slept with him."

"Oh, gross."

"Yeah, I know, he's really old and fat."

"Totally," Chase agreed, uncharacteristically.

"Well, what do we do about this? Should I tell her?"

"Absolutely not. Then she would know that I told you."

"Oooooh!" Jack squealed. "So much drama! I just love it."

"Ugh," Chase groaned.