Swallow The Moon

Disclaimer – I don’t own Ed, Edd N Eddy, the Cartoon Network does.

Rated R for stuff in other chapters. This one’s pretty PG. But this is a slash story, if you haven’t realized that by now.

Author’s Note – I know this is a story of songfics, but this chapter could not be denied. The poem is mine. Regularly scheduled programming will resume shortly.

Underneath My Bones

 Double D was sitting at his desk, head buried in his hands. His hat was off, thrown quite uncharacteristically onto his bed, where it lay like a discarded crown. His hair usually bugged him, it was so long and... and pretty... but today he found he wanted to leave it down. It gave him something to hide behind.

 He lifted his head and let his eyes drift to a single piece of white paper on his desk.  His own neat, tiny handwriting sprawled across his vision in curving trails of blue ink.

 He wasn’t sure why he’d written what he had. He was no poet. And he would never give this poem or any other to his muse even if it was perfection incarnate.

 But he reread it anyway, not understanding at all why the words swam in his vision.

I Didn’t Want This

By Eddward

I didn’t want this...

 To see it all end before my eyes

 To watch you fall from the sky

 To be scattered in the wind

 To be trapped in my own sin

 To hold you close and still be far

 To let us both down hard

 To give you up after letting you in

 To shove you away though you are my twin

 The grittier, dirtier part of me

 The part I always wanted to be

 To let you go and set you free

 To know you’re never going to be with me

 To break your heart as I break my own

 To feel you sliding underneath my bones

 To give you up and never let you see

 Just what this is doing to me

 To let you down by not being there

 By not understanding just how much you care

  It’s not as if it didn’t show

 You love me too much for me not to know

 To be alone, to not be with you

 To let you see that I’m just a fool

I didn’t want this

 I’ll never say I didn’t want you

 But I didn’t want this

 If only he could tell Eddy all this, if only he could apologize and beg forgiveness.  If only he could retreat from this pain back into the recesses of his mind and his memories, where it was safe and he was still warm.

 His head fell back to his hands, and he didn’t understand at all why soon his hands were soaked.

 If only.