Aishiteru Means I Love You

"Uh, Yama?" Lexington asked the older gargoyle, looking decidedly uncomfortable. "Can you, um, help me figure out how to put this thing on?" Lex was having some trouble figuring out how to wear the hakama. Yama was already in kimono and hakama. Lex had gotten as far as the kimono.

Yama sighed patiently and sat down the package he had been carrying. "It's simple. You just step into them, this part goes in the back." He knelt down as he assisted Lex with the garment. "And you bring the himo back like...ah, yes you have this piercing in your wings. We can get around that."

"Hey, watch your talons!" said Lex. "I'm pretty sensitive down there."

"Yama?" Staghart walked in. "What are you doing with my boyfriend?"

Yama realized the situation. He was kneeling before another male and fiddling with his trousers /and/ his wings. "This isn't what it looks like!" he protested, his cheeks flushing.

Fang walked in and took in the situation. Yama was on his knees, Lex had his trousers half off and Staghart had a camera. "Whoa! It's Gargoyles gone Wild!"

"Great." sighed Lex. "I'm on an episode of /Three's Company/!"

"That show was a rip-off of /Man About the House/." Staghart commented.

"Let me explain." Yama said, raising up to a standing position.

"Yeah." laughed Fang. "Explain why you were helping the little fag off with his okama!" Yama smacked Fang twice. "Ow! Why'd ya hit me twice? I only said the F word once!"

"You said 'okama'." said Yama, going back to tying Lex's hakama. "That means 'fag' in Japanese. I told you what would happen if you used that word." Lex gasped as Yama pulled the himo a bit tighter than really necessary.

"You didn't say anything about using it in other languages!" Fang protested. "I thought 'okama' were these skirt things Robyn and Dingo expect us to wear." Fang held up his own pair of hakama trousers partially wadded in his hand.

"They are called hakama." said Yama as he rose to his feet and glared at the way Fang was handling the garment. "And they're not skirts! They are respectable articles of clothing that should not be mishandled."

"Whatever they are," said Staghart. "Lex, you are rocking that! Give us a smile!" He took a picture of Lex

"You really think so?" Lex modeled his new outfit. "It's actually pretty comfortable. Help me with the boutonniere?" As Staghart was pinning the flower to Lex's kimono, Dingo came out of a room dressed in his tuxedo and was pinning on his boutonniere. "Hey, Dingo!" said Lex. "You really should've gone for the hakama look. It's gotta be a lot more comfortable than that tux."

"He's the groom." Fang pointed out. "He doesn't have to wear a skirt if he doesn't want to."

"It's not a skirt!" Yama snapped.

Fang ignored him. "So, I take it the wedding's still on? I thought Robyn was still pissed off about last night."

"Yeah, thanks a lot for that, mate." said Dingo, doing up a cuff link. "I was able to convince her that it was all your doin'. She accepted that pretty quickly."

Matrix and Nashville approached, both dressed in kimono and hakama. Nashville had a stack of programs under his arm. "Your mother has assured me that you look like a handsome young gentleman." said Matrix.

"I look like a dork!" Nashville complained.

"Yo, Matrix!" said Fang. "Where'd you run off to last night?"

"I conducted an experiment." said Fang. "One of the ladies you invited to the party was compliant in assisting me in physical research of sexual intercourse."

Most of the men just stared at Matrix while Staghart put his hands over Nashville's ears.

"I know what that means!" Nashville protested. "I'm not a baby!"

Yama decided to change the subject by calling attention to the package he had laid aside. "Dingo, I understand it is customary among humans to give presents to the bride and groom at a wedding ceremony."

"Aw, you didn't havta go to this trouble, Yama!" Dingo said, taking the gift. "But, thanks. Nash, can you put this on the table with the others?"

"While it is not customary to open a gift in the presence of a giver," said Yama. "I would like it very much if you opened that one now. If you don't mind."

"Nah. I don't mind." Dingo opened the present and took out a fan. He opened the fan to reveal it had been painted with an image of a flying crane in sumi e style. "Well, that's real nice." said Dingo.

"In Japan," said Yama. "It is customary for a groom to carry a fan at his wedding."

"Oh," said Dingo. "So, if he starts gettin' all nervous and sweaty he can cool himself off, right?" Dingo fanned himself with the gift.

"It is a symbol." said Yama. "As a fan can only be of use when opened, so too the heart must open itself to love."

"And so too must my sphincter open itself to blow chunks." said Fang, making Nashville giggle.

"Fang, go get dressed!" Yama scolded. Fang left.

Dingo noticed a red mark on the edge of the fan. Three lines, the center one taller, all joined by a common line at the base. "Yama, you painted this yourself, didn't you?"

"Hai, I paint a little." said Yama. "I made a similar one for your bride that Sora is presenting her with. When you display them, have the cranes facing each other. Cranes symbolize being happily married for life."

"Well, I thank you again for the present, mate." said Dingo. "Staghart, can you take a photo of us?" He stood next to Yama and held up his new present.

"Right then." Staghart held up the camera. "You know how to smile, right, Yama?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Sora, thank you!" Robyn admired the fan. "It's beautiful!" Robyn was dressed in a long, white gown with an empire waist tied with a wide blue sash and a portrait neckline, a spray of white gardenias just at her cleavage. She accessorized with a pearl necklace and matching earrings.

"I only constructed the fans." said Sora. "Yama-Chan painted them. Dingo-San will receive the other."

"They're lovely, Sora. Oh, Yoshimi!" Robyn noticed how her flower girl was dressed in a pastel indigo kimono and was carrying a basket of ume petals. A circlet of ume blossoms adorned her jet black hair. "You're so cute! Totemo kawaii!"

"Arigato!" Yoshimi said with a shy smile.

"You have to take small steps, Angela-Chan." Riko was saying to Angela, who was still getting used to the new clothes. Even the elaborate hair do topped with the white chrysanthemum was affecting her balance. "And you need to change your earrings." Her usual gold hoops didn't go well with the silver and indigo kimono Angela was wearing. Riko helped her exchange them for a pair of silver and crystal chandelier style earrings. Shinju said something to Riko in Japanese. "Hai!" Riko responded. "Excuse please, Shinju-Chan needs a comb for her wig. I go get." She left the room.

"Speaking of which," said Sora. "Let me help you with your veil, Robyn-San." Sora started pinning the translucent fabric into Robyn's hair with a headband of seed pearls.

"You look beautiful, Robyn." said Angela. "I hope I look half as nice when I marry Broadway."

"Oh, thank you, Angela." Robyn smiled sadly. "I just wish, well, never mind."

"Still upset about your brother?" Angela guessed.

"I've only one brother." Robyn said simply. "And he is the one who will give me away at the wedding."

"Giving away the bride is a curious custom." said Sora. "Would you follow such a custom at your wedding, Angela?"

"Probably not." Angela said. "Much as I love Goliath, Tom was the one who was there for me growing up. And I know Coldstone thinks of me as a daughter. At any rate, we're having a double ceremony, both couples coming down the aisle together."

"I don't know much about gargoyle mating ceremonies." said Robyn. "Since you raise young communally, I'd think it's safe to say giving away the bride is right out. The Ishimura clan has adapted many Japanese traditions into their ceremony. Are same sex pairs common among gargoyles?"

"Our numbers tend to be small," said Sora. "So, perhaps same gender pairs are not quite as common as with humans, but their love is just as much respected as any other." She smoothed down Robyn's veil. "Beautiful! Now, just a little make-up." Sora took up an eyeliner pencil and went to work. Shinju began brushing some rouge on Angela's cheeks.

"You really don't have to." said Angela. Shiju motioned for her to sit and said something in Japanese.

"She said you have nice cheekbones." said Sora. "You should play them up a little." Angela sighed and resigned herself to being made up.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Naotaro Moriyama sang "Mirai Future" on the mix tape Yuri made as Hidiki lit the candles by the altar. Judge Kimura and Dingo took their places as the bride, her brother and attendents prepared for the procession.

"Where is Fang?" asked Yama.

"I'm wondering where Riko went off to." said Sora. "She went off an hour ago to find a comb for Shinju's wig. We had to make do with a bobby pin."

"It's nearly eight." said Jason, checking his watch. "We can't wait any longer for them. Yoshimi! Yoshimi, come here, sweetheart. Could someone get our flower girl over here?" Sora led Yoshimi away from the floral display she was examining and whispered instructions to her as she placed her at the threshold. "Yama, Sora, you go out first. Should we draw straws to see who goes next or what?"

"Go by the program." said Robyn. "Nashville's been handing them out. Where is he?" She looked about and saw the small beaked gargoyle handing out a program to a guest and bowing to him. "Nashville! My brother needs to see a program!"

Jason opened the rose decorated program. "Ah, you picked a Robert Burns poem? It's very nice, Robyn. Alright, Angela, you and Lexington will go out next. Just put your arm around his...oh, how's that gonna work?"

"I can just pull my wing in." said Lex.

"Fine then." said Jason. "Who's Fred Sykes?"

"That's Fang's real name." said Robyn. "We thought it would look nicer on the programs."

"Well, as he and Riko seem to have taken a powder, Matrix and Shinju will be next in line. Nashville, you and Izumi are next."

"We don't gotta hold hands, do we?" asked Nashville.

"I don't wanna hold your hand either!" snapped Izumi.

"Please, children." Jason sighed. "Try to get along. And that just leaves you and me, sister dear!"

Jason hobbled over to the doors, opening them and signaling to Yuri. Yuri quickly changed to the next track. Phil Collins performed his cover of "Somewhere" as Yoshimi scattered ume blossoms over the aisle. The pairs of attendants followed her and took their designated spots. Vinnie was drying his eyes on a handkerchief. Broadway's jaw dropped when he saw Angela. Usually, she only bothered with her hair or make-up for Halloween or Christmas. He thought she was always beautiful, but seeing her gilded, carrying a single red rose, was a rare treat. Staghart had the video camera out, documenting the ceremony. "Where's Fang?" Dingo whispered as Yama stood by him.

"I don't know." he whispered back. "We couldn't find Riko either."

Everyone forgot all about the missing attendants when the opening strains to Aerosmith's "I Don't Want to Miss A Thing" signaled the coming of the bride. Dingo smiled at the image of his beloved all in white, carrying a bouquet of red roses, her veil floating around her. He had jokingly told her he wanted to see her come down the aisle to Aerosmith's "Rag Doll", but it was dismissed as inappropriate. They both liked the new movie /Armageddon/, so this song was chosen. She was walking even slower than the usual bride. They reached the end of the aisle just when Steven Tyler got to the line "I just wanna stay with you in this moment forever...." Jason pulled back his sister's veil, kissed her cheek and took a seat. Vinnie could be heard blowing his nose.

"Dearly beloved," Judge Kimura announced, ignoring the embarrassing noise. "We are gathered...." A loud thumping noise could be heard. "We are gathered to witness...." Judge Kimura raised his voice to be heard over the loud, rhythmic thumping.

/Please, God,/ Dingo silently prayed. /Don't let that be Fang. Please don't let that be Fang!/

"Oh, yeah! Riko suave!" Fang was heard shouting. "Who's your daddy? Who's your daddy?"

"Oh! You are, Fang-Chan! Oh! Hai! Hai! Haaaaaaai!"

Dingo turned his gaze to the Heavens. "It's because we decided on a secular service, isn't it?" he asked whoever was listening.

"Give it to me baby!" Fang was heard screaming from the alcove the wedding party had just left and was now returning to.

"Kimochiiii!" Riko answered. "Motto! Motto! Iku, iku!"

"I don't know what you're sayin', baby, but I love how you say it!"

Yama opened the banging door of the closet he had passed minutes earlier. A half dressed Fang fell out with a similarly disheveled Riko on top of him. Hidiki clapped his hands over Yoshimi's eyes. Hiroshi clapped his hands over Hidiki's eyes. Katana clapped her hands over Nashville's eyes as Kaede clapped her hands over Izumi's eyes. "Uh...hi, everyone!" Fang said sheepishly as Riko tried to cover herself. "Not late for the wedding are we?"

Yama's eyes glowed as he drew his katana. "Stand up!" he growled, pointing his sword at Fang. "You too, Riko!" Cautiously, they both stood, while arranging their clothes in some semblance of modesty. "Kai," said Yama. "You know your duty."

"Hai." Kai nodded and stood before the two miscreants. Riko hugged Fang's arm. "Brothers and sisters, we are gathered to witness the joining of this male and this female in a lifelong bond."

"J-joining?" stammered Fang. "Lifelong bond? What's he talking about?"

"Eee! I so happy!" squealed Riko. "I get kawaii cat boy as my mate!"

"Mate? Mate!" Fang was near panic.

Yama poked Fang with the tip of his katana. "You have dishonored my sister!" he growled. "You will take her as your mate!"

"Uh, Yama?" said Dingo. "Think a mo, mate. Do you really want Fang as a member of your family?"

"This isn't about what I want!" growled Yama. "This is about my sister's honor!"

"Oh, please!" said Yuri with an eye roll. "Riko hasn't had 'honor' since we went to that David Bowie concert back in 88!"

"Riko!" snapped Yama. "What was the name of the piece of filth who defiled you?"

"David Bowie." she said with a proud smirk.

"You got your cherry plucked by David Bowie?" asked Staghart. "Give me four, you lucky slut!" They clapped hands together.

"I think he's married to a supermodel now." said Lexington.

"In that case," said Yama. "you may proceed, Kai-San."

"Do you, Riko," asked Kai. "Take this male to be your mate for life? Will you love and honor him as long as you both shall live?"

"Hai!" Riko squealed, hugging Fang's arm.

"And do you, Fang," asked Kai. "Take this female to be your mate for life? Will you love and honor her as long as you both shall live?"

"Uh...well....er...." Yama poked Fang insistently with the tip of his sword. /Well, better wed than dead!/ "I do." Fang sighed.

"Then as leader of this clan, I declare you mated for life. You may touch brows." Riko grabbed Fang's face and touched her brows to his before laying a big wet kiss on his lips.

"Can we get back to the original wedding now?" asked Judge Kimura.

The wedding continued without further interruption. The bride and groom took their vows, exchanged rings and kissed. Judge Kimura presented them as husband and wife. Dingo took Robyn in his arms for yet another kiss while everyone applauded.


A/N: "Motto" means "More". "Iku" means "I'm coming!" "Kimochi ii" means "That feels good."