The Ultimate ZADAGABAGABAMATAZAGAMR novel

To enter into class, Zim used a hypnosis ray to brainwash everyone into thinking he was there on time, before running into class and sitting down. The problem was, Zim accidentally sat in Dib's chair. And in the next moment, Dib absentmindedly sat in Zim's chair. The two were totally unaware of why the classroom looked different, as Miss Bitters began to drone on about how Dennis Leary was right and everyone should just shut the fuck up.
"And you, Melvin, you needed to shut up when you caught me shaving my legs in the Skool toilet! And you, Gretchen, you needed to shut the fuck up when you wanted a soda! But no..."
At this time, Dib and Zim started taking notice of the distinct stench caused by each others' body odor soaked into the desk. "Wow", Dib thought, "this desk smells better today. I mean, I would notice if it smelled the same, because I KNOW THOSE CLASSROOM GNOMES ARE PLANNING SOMETHING HORRIBLE! Nobody believes me, but those Gnomes exist! Agent Retardo said so himself, and he's the friggin VP of the Swollen Eyeball Network!"
"Mmmmm", Zim said out loud, like he usually does, "This desk smells really awesome! I love it! It reminds me of....of...nothing really. But my body is reacting to it in an odd way".
Only Dib could notice that Zim began slowly humping the desk, his worm-like tongue, licking the surface, his hands holding the desk against his gyrating hips. Soon Dib began to do it too. The two locked eyes and humped in synchronisit the the iambic pentameter of Miss Bitters' rant. Soon the squeaking of the desks reached a climax, as Zim felt a new feeling wash over his mighty squeedilyspooch. Dib felt something new too, something warm and shocking at the same time. Even with the atomic wedgie that Zim (or you, for that matter) never noticed before, Dib felt like a new man.
"...and that, class, is why I hate all male gigolos named Carl". The teacher concluded. "Now go home and never return,m gom going to blow up the Skool."
The kids ran playfully from the classroom, and Dib and Zim were soon the only students left, except for Old Kid, who suffered a heart attack when discovering that twelve-year-olds do not get social security benefits.
After being spanked for what seemed an unusually long time by Miss Bitters because the two didn't finish their 10000000 page graphic story about a homosexual in the city, the two heroes began to part ways to go to their respective houses.
"Wait!" Dib yelled.
"What is it, meat human?" Zim replied.
"L3Tz G3T 2gethR 2n1ght LoL"
"D00D 4\/\/$0/\/\3"
"0k TTYL LOL"
After a brief exchange of incomprehensible symbols, Zim knew he needed to be at Dib's at 5:00 sharp. He went home, perfumed himself with Odeur le' Douche', put on his shiniest wig and made Gir stuff his head full of sex toys for no forseen activity whatsoever. But somewhere else in town, another special someone was making a date as well."
"I knew yu'd like it" typed a mysterious person in a dark room.
"You're totaly hot, let'z do it" wronothnother mysterious stranger.
"Ok, meeet me behid Deelisus Weenie at 5:00 sharp" one person responded.
"What will you be wearig ask asked one person, nay, one man.
"The usual, ;) " typed the other person.