To put it simply this story is gripping, it is an emotional rollercoaster that leaves you out of breath. I actually dislike the parts where you describe the sexual acts which on top of what I think is the intendeded sickness I get from reading them are also kind of cringy and have the most out of place and unlikable writing of anypart of the story, honstly I would like it if you didn't try to insert anykind of eroticism the story. But aside from that the character drama and the prose used in all other parts of the story are superb and keeps me glued to the screen. Though I really hope you continue this story, I would hate for the story to just end on chapter five which although was dramatic and gripping its ending was actually to dark and somewhat SOD breaking for me as I am just starting to become increasingly strained to believe that this can be kept hidden forever I mean at some point Rita or Lynn Sr have to figure out what is going on with Lincoln if it continues escalating.
Honestly that would be a great direction for the story to go in and is something I would love to read happen because that would probably be the most explosive, dramatic, and gripping part of the story if it was allowed to play out. The sisters don't even neccesarily need to be punished all that much and maybe not all of them need to be found out(Like Lynn, Lori, and Leni get found out but not anyone else, though in such a scenario I could imagine Luna confessing solely out of guilt if Lincoln refused to tell on her.), the parents might decide to just keep everything low down for appearences and maybe at most send Lori, Leni, and Lynn(The relatively worse ones) of to boarding schools far away from home while they may only give some harsh restrictions to Luna and Luan and have them undergo counselling in secret.
But anyway this is all just suggestion, I think other people will agree with this but you are always free to do your own thing with your story I just think this could take it in a better direction.
Great story! I really felt it was gripping and dug at your emotions! Hope this wasn't the last chapter!
I still feel goosebumps at the angst you bring with every chapter. You know how to make Lincoln's suffering seem more real and slow the reader's breath as they pray with Lincoln for a stop. I feel really thrilled with the story and hope to read it a lot more. Excellent work with the last chapter
Lincoln's surrender is the end? I thought I would go further, the story is very good anyway, thanks for writing it.
Easily the best Loud House story on this site, I visit this story frequently to see if you have updated.
Hope the story is not dead, at any rate, I hope you keep writing this wonderfully twisted story.
Well, I can see why it took you a while to write chapter 5. It's the length of a novella! But a lot happens in it, and I like that the story moves farther than I expected it to in the space of the chapter. Some other comments (SPOILERS AHEAD):
--Thanks for explaining the absence of Clyde.
--"The future seemed to race towards him inevitably, mercilessly, a vast grey expanse devoid of hope, frozen in endless twilight." Dang, son, that's some imagery right there.
--Lynn's inevitable violation of Lincoln went pretty much the way I thought it would, but that's actually a good thing, With everything that happened in the previous chapters, it was important that this rape have Lynn's individual stamp on it.
--The whole thing with Lucy was a welcome surprise. I wasn't sure whether you were going to involve any of the preadolescent sisters, but you did a nice job with Lucy's gradual evolution toward taking advantage of Lincoln in her own emotionally twisted way. It also leaves open a lot of possibilities for we readers to speculate about.
--The sheer popularity of this story blows me away. As of this writing, it has 65 reviews, which is the most I've ever seen on any fandom I read. And people are making fanart of it! In fact, I first learned that chapter 5 had been posted because I saw a fan pic of it on Pixiv.
I'm quite curious as to where the story will go from here. Keep up the good work.
Awesome work as always, one of the beat fics of the loudhouse, just hoping the next chapter just takes some months
Damn That's.....That's Messed Up.....Hey Can U PM me
Damn That's messed up.....hey can you PM Me
Reread through the whole story again, my favorite fanfic of all time as well. Your other work (Fashion, party, and I hear Electromagnetism) is also very high on my list. I can't help but read on even as it gets darker and darker, I do hope things work out, you have built up the weight of trama and it strikes right into your guts.
Love that each chapter has focused on one (and in the latest two) of the sisters, your story arch for each is wonderfully self contained. I can't help but want to see a chapter focused on or including how the group sisters are dealing with the changes as well as interactions between them. For instance I wonder what a silent night in Luna and Luan's room is like now? Your skill as a writer and exploration will lead to fantastic places and I just want to chime in with how much inspiration you have brought to the comunity.
Speaking of which, I did a set of sketches inspired by this. Posted on Pixiv, I hope you like them and get a chance to check them out. :)
https://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=manga&illust_id=73906064