You can always count on Lisa Loud to cause lots of horny problems
At least Lincoln got a lot of pleasure from the whole debacle
Wow that was good. I especially like how he gave each of the charcters some personality and uniquness. I know it's based on an existing TV franchise, but holding on to their identities and keeping the personalities is no easy feat. The intro portion, regarding trainer bra's an pads with wings, I found even more arousing than some of the actul sex scenes because it just feels so normal.
Leni turned to Lori. “What are they saying to each other?”
“I’m not totally sure,” the older teen replied, “but I think they’re talking dirty.”
Bwahahaha!
THIS WAS THE BEST FANFICTION THAT I HAVE EVER READ AND I WANT U TO MAKE ANOTHER CHAPTER WHERE THE SCENT ON LINCOLN AFFECTED ALL THE GIRLS IN SCHOOL PLEASE
You, my friend, are a mad genius.
First, the set-up was both believable (in a cartoon context) and interesting. It reminded me of Cronenberg’s Shivers, which, if you haven’t seen it, has a very similar premise. And I mean that as a huge compliment. I love that movie.
Second, your characterizations were spot-on, from what I’ve seen of the show (my kids watch it). It read, for the most part, like an episode of the show, right down to Lincoln going out of his way to make each sister’s experience special, and then them teaming up to return the favor. I also laughed a few times, and not just in a “What the fuck?” kind of way. When the tomboy says, “I’m gonna lick his balls!” I lost it. Kudos.
PS. I literally created this account just to review your story, though I think I’d like to write a funny fanfic for something. I’ve been writing for fifteen years and I’ve never done one. Looks fun.
These Loud Kids, Including:
Lincoln: Get Ready For This
Lori: Tribal Dance
Leni: Maximum Overdrive
Luna: The Magic Friend
Luan: Workaholic
Lynn: The Real Thing
Lucy: Twilight Zone
Lana: No One
Lola: Here I Go
Lisa: No Limit
Excluding Lily: Let The Beat Control Your Body
Though I'm sad to see the adventures end, the final chapter was fantastic. First off, Lisa doing self-surgery is a bit scary. I really liked how he appreciated Lisa's well-defined young body, whether it was from the injection or just nice to notice in general. It was fun as Lincoln kept having to figure out what Lisa's technical language, though it was really funny how quickly he caught onto "doggy style." After that, their "dirty talk" was terrific, especially as her pretentious vocabulary started to crack; when she told him she was losing her ability to form sentences and even words and he took it as a challenge, that was even better. In the end, I think both of them were quite pleased with the result.
I was getting a little worried for Lincoln when he was still up for more despite his exhaustion and the sisters were ready to go again. It was quite mature of Lori to notice that, even though they would have done it any way at all, he'd gone out of his way to consider each of their personalities and likes instead of just taking advantage of them.
The reverse-gangbang scene played out beautifully, though I had to wonder where Lola had read about blowjobs. (Highlights for Sluts?) When she told Lana to take over and the elder twin shouted, "Gross!" I knew that meant she's be all over it. (And she was.) It was kind of sweet that all nine of them were just as exhausted by the end as Lincoln.
Then, I don't know why, but I had been absolutely convinced that Lisa had mentioned birth control when she gave out the cherry chews, but nope: this was even funnier. Of course she could take care of the problem, but like the whole thing only after her oversight had created the problem in the first place. (Sorry all preggo fans.)
Finally, the show-style ending with Lincoln's "moral" was nice, though when Lori scolded him for his mishandling of his "boy stuff" that was the perfect little shot that made it perfect for the series.
Thanks again for such a fantastic story, and I'm honored to have been the proofreader (so I could read it sooner!).
On the last page (from 6 to 7), Lincoln looks like a sick pedo.