rate_review Reviews

Ahhhh! I wanted more! :(

What about posting this on Archive of Our Own or Fanfiction.net? And maybe, continuing this? It's really good, really :) 

Oh please update this sooon! LOL I LOVE IT! Poor Danny though with Vlad teasing him like that. I think there's more to it than what he thinks though. X3

OMG OMG OMG OMG
I'm SO loving this!
Please update soon!!!

Greetings!

You last posted on this story on my birthday. It's an awesome present, and I really thank you, but you aren't going to make me wait until this years birthday to post the next part, are you? :D

Seriously, I love the way you have it developing, and the pacing is great, as is the characterization and interaction.

I really can't wait to see where the plotline is going to go!

wow
I really love it
please keep this story up
it really is good
cant wait to see what happens :D

Interesting...

I'm glad Danny Phantom finally got split into sections, and having the first story in the slash section, that's awesome!

I like the story so far. You've managed a believable scenario to get Danny over to Vlad's place, get Maddie removed from the story for the most part, and have actual plot development to build into the steamy stuff. Throughout the story there are a few typos, but the only thing that really threw me off the rhythm while reading was the quotation mark problems. A couple times in the story there's no closing quotation and then the next line begins with dialogue and makes me think it's still the same character speaking. The other little bit of editing which always helps the readers out is leaving an extra space between your paragraphs to make more of a distinction of where one paragraph ends and another begins. Formatting from word processors generally does not import in to aff.net when uploading story files, so a few things like that end up being something you have to do manually from the publish panel (or what I do now is turn off the formatting when I'm writing the story and just hit the enter key after each paragraph.)

I like your overall depiction of Danny as far as his demeanor and outlook go. The fast moving bouts of confusion can throw you for a loop, but since he seems to be having inner dialogue with himself about those very issues I'm assuming that's a major story element that is going to come into play at a later time. My only story suggestion would be to maybe make Vlad seem a little more personable as a lot of his descriptors make me feel like I'm reading about a statue except the parts where it actually mentions that he's holding emotions on the inside. I know that's his particular character... but that type of mentality just always drives me crazy... it's probably just a personal thing though... And oh yeah! The remorseful ghost/not ghost type is a cool idea! I can't wait to find out more about poor Adrienne and her brother!

Thanks a lot for sharing this story, and hope to see more updates soon!

Yay an update! I liked the teasing bit; I practically felt the heat from Danny's embaressment.

(“She's seen me Daniel, in my ghost form. She's afraid of me. “Not surprising. You have that effect on most women.” Danny grumbled sarcastically) This line just made me smile. I like how the story is going so far and I can't wait for the steamy stuff to happen! It's always hard finding good Vlad/Danny slash so please keep the updates coming.

I like this story a lot so far! It has a nice and comfortable flow in it, and a very good interpretation of Danny's feelings (or lack of) towards Vlad. the only thing I can offer you as a critique really is to remove the 'I suck at summaries' bit in your summary. It doesn't attract readers to look at your work if you're already insulting yourself before we're reading the story. Great work still! And Now to the next chapter.

A few typos here n' there. But great work! I'd like to hear more about this mystery ghost!