rate_review Reviews

Where to begin? I've been drifting back and forth through AFF (and DeviantArt) looking for a certain Azula\TyLee story I came across ohhh months ago. Instead, I found yours. I've been pacing myself over these last 3 or so days, not to just take it apart and consume it like some Real Critic for maybe `The New York Times` ( HA !! ), but like 'ncg' said; OMFG! I did understand the concept of that paragraph, yet the mechanics of it were rather daunting. 'DrunkenScotsman' was also rightfully colorful in How to comment on this little `Nightmare` of yours. This, a whopping SEVEN chapters, has been 'up' through to its 'editing' since 2008 til 2010, really, only 15 months, and only has 25 reviews???!!?!?!!!! Well, now, you'll have mine.
This IS Powerful, with How your words connect an image to an sensation. I agree with several other reviewers' in that what has happened to MAI and Ty LEE is something that not even Katara could fix with a month of Full Moons to empower her. As `6_Dethroned` came to its end, I felt your Azula was readying herself in another way. She had made a "choice", and it was her choice, there in that Lantern room.... that not-all-that-even-medium_sized room. A room that had the two closest examples she could say were 'friends', and perhaps the two most probable people that had taken them away from her. Well, her 'choice' would set them All free, and may Agni save their souls, and consign the men to whatever Hell creatures as they deserved. And chp 6 ended. For those out there who know High Fantasy, there is now and again a Magic-User or another person with deep wells of power confined or controlled inside.... Until that one last moment... and they Invoke a Final Strike. Think ThermoNUCLEAR Bomb! Before reading 7, I really thought Azula was ready to pull something. Now, instead, it might be inside the Fire Nation Court.
Ty Lee is ready to be the Palace Whore; male Or female, she'll have Lots of people to `practice` on. Mai... I could see her remoulded into an Artist; Oils on Canvas, Clay or Marble under her fingertips. Quite a bit of Irony, that.
Pushing 5 years since Anything NEW???!!
Seeing what you've already done to the girls hurts, but you have to finish. And as YOU see the ending. Not how we might BEG: please PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE prettyplease with chocolate springled on top please Please!! NNOOOOOOOWWWWW!!
Or, you know.... whenever.
Thanks for this.

this was an awesome story, and was very well written. wish it updated still...but damn was it worth reading!

Some of the best pure writing I've come across and a wonderful psychological deconstruction. Azula, Mai, and Ty Lee were three of the best written and effective villains in media for quite some time, and watching your story break each of them down in believable fashion is an inspiration in terms of technique. Huge, huge fan of this story.

“It’s like I was telling my friend that you look out there and you feel like you remember that you forgot that there were other kinds of water while you fixate on a wave that you sometimes watch going under while you forget that you’re supposed to remember not to do training because it’s easy to just pick up on something you were supposed to not be doing compared to forgetting that you want to do something you know, like it cycles around and around in your head like the lap of a wave because it’s easy to forget remembering what it is that you want to do like- what’s seven times eighty-three and the five above that- while you remember its like its on the tip of your tongue...”

OMFG Do you know how many times I had to re-read this paragraph to make sense of it?! WHAT THE HELL?!

This story is painfully good to read - the characters are fully fleshed out, the descriptions are horrific, the plot has an agonizing inevitability to it. I remember my stomach churned, on the edge of making me vomit, as each of the girls was chipped away, chipped away - especially Mai. Good God, man - there is no greater evil in the world than what they did to her. The whole thing was like a train wreck I just couldn't turn away from, nor prevent.

And that's what hurt me most of all as a reader - that there was absolutely no hope for any of these girls to resist.

You, sir or ma'am, went to a darkly artistic place, one that is very difficult to go to without sounding cheesy; you accomplished it, and I take my hat off to you.

This is truly one of the best stories I've read on the whole site. The attention to detail and the carefully crafted psychology of the characters is without peer. A mindbreak genre classic. The latest chapter leaves some loose ends, so I hold out hope that you will wrap it up with all the training concluded--it would be satisfying to see Azula become a completely brainwashed puppet at the end. Of course in this type of story sex is not focus nor should it be; but if you would indulge us with a foursome at the end, well, I can't think of a better way to demonstrate psychological conquest.

Dear God, moar already please!

I'd give you ideas but I don't want to patronise you

Holy SHIT. After waiting so long for the next chapter, this was absolutely worth it.

Eagerly awaiting the rest!

Just read this again and it's excellent no matter how often I do.

I know you must get this alot but please please please PLEASE deliver the rest soon, the suspense is killing us X'D

What an awesome piece of work so far! As a fellow author making use of the Dai Li mind control aspect, I applaud you for the great work you have done so far and I look forward to seeing more on this in the future. I have recently resumed writing my aforementioned story and hope to get back on track with it in the near future - please feel free to stop in and let me know what you think. :)

Regards,

Vortex