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July 18, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Nice. I really liked the first chapter. Wasn't quite so sure about the second one, but three and four built on it, and its shaping up to be really solid story. I like it, and seeing your talent for the erotic stuff is good. I've read a lot of your stuff on fanfiction.net, and this is at least as good as a lot of those. I look forward to the next chapter.
-Jawelik
-Jawelik
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July 17, 2007 at 12:00 AM
An amazing chapter. The sex is an afterthought at this point, which is saying something, considering where the story is posted. I'm really looking forward to the next chapter. One thing, though. You make elementary mistakes with spelling. Commonly mispelled words like their and they're, its and it's, stuff like that. Watch out for that stuff, huh?
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July 15, 2007 at 12:00 AM
I'm looking forward to the next chapter. Nympho Kim is always something to be surprised at.
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July 15, 2007 at 12:00 AM
The back stories on Bonnie and Kim add a dimension to the story not usually found here. Dr. Tara was a bit of a surprise, but I must admit, I like her ideas on group therapy. Waiting to find out if there was anything left to bury after Ron got done with the terrorists.
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July 14, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Man you never cease to amaze me. Only you could take a pornographic story and make it about more than just the sex. I am really intrigued to see what exactly Ron is holding back and how Shego fits into this whole thing. As always looking forward to future chapters.
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July 13, 2007 at 12:00 AM
An interesting take. I'll admit I skipped a lot, but I plan to go back and read it now that I know the sitch is mutual for Kim and Ron.
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July 13, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Who says adult fanfiction has to be all sex? This was a great second chapter. You could post it at ff.net, if it weren't for the adult situations.
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July 12, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Awesome chapter mate...I can't wait for the next chapter :D
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July 12, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Another great chapter. Isn't it amazing how these little one-off fics can end up becoming entire series?
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July 12, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Great story. I liked how you made the flow of the story change yet remain very "interesting". Keep up the great work.